So I Was Talking with a Deaf Woman…
Proverbs 16:1-9, 16-24
I’m usually around tame bodies of water, but last week our family went on vacation to Ocean City, Maryland and experienced the Atlantic Ocean. Once we pulled our suitcases into our rental unit, we quickly changed into beach clothes and headed toward the shore, drawn to water. Even with sunglasses on, we squinted at the blue expanse before us, as far as the eye could see.
After trudging through hot sand, laden with towels and other necessities, we found a spot and set our things down. The wind was whipping, and the seagulls soaring as we eagerly crossed the final few yards. Our feet felt the shock of cold water, but we stayed put as we slowly sank, just a bit, into the cold sand.
It’s entrancing to watch waves form and crest and crash down. All ages find it fascinating. Another thing that impresses and lulls us is the sound of the ocean: there’s a quiet pause that’s followed by a thunderous crash as water hits the sandy shore. Then comes a subtle sound as the water ebbs, pulling itself back. That in-between time is when we feel anticipation. We’re alert, knowing that soon another wave will crest and wildly crash down on the shore. The rhythm of waves ebbing and flowing never ceases. I found myself wondering who else in the wide world was also standing on a shoreline in awe and gratitude. People living on every continent experience the same rhythm and power of ocean waves, crashing and receding on their own shores.
I savored the sights and sounds of the ocean, but I also did a good deal of walking near the shore. I enjoyed three things: getting some exercise, searching for shells, and people-watching. I noticed that many people prefer to sit quietly and anonymously under their umbrellas, or on their towels, reading or napping. But others were frolicking in the waves or trying to catch a wave with a boogie board – with mixed results. Kids of all ages happily dug holes and trenches in the sand; others built sandcastles. A good number enjoyed taking a walk or a jog on the beach. As I watched the kaleidoscope of activity around me, I noticed something - a simple thing really, but so important. It’s not so much what happens to us in life (or at the beach), it’s how we choose to respond that makes all the difference.
I want to share some scenes and stories with you this morning from the beach and elsewhere, and as I do, we’ll view them through the lens of the Serenity Prayer: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference…
As the sun was setting and much of the beach crowd had left, I saw a young boy enthusiastically skipping flat rocks across a long shallow pool near the shoreline. His mom stood nearby patiently watching; when her son turned toward her again and again after a really good set of skips, she would compliment him or smile warmly. Her son’s face lit up with pure joy when his mom did that because it meant she was paying attention to him and praising him when he did well. Aren’t those such simple things?
As we got ready to leave, they were also leaving. That’s when we learned that all day long, this woman’s son didn’t want to splash in the waves or dig in the sand, he only wanted to skip rocks. She accepted that; it was what he wanted do. She didn’t judge it as a poor choice for a special day at the ocean. She graciously supported his choice. Did I mention that the boy was skipping rocks all day long? Somehow this mom had noticeable serenity as the sun was setting behind her. She chose to accept what she couldn’t change, and as she did the result was contentment. A peace emanated from her that I hadn’t seen anywhere else on the beach that day. How well do you accept things you cannot change? And can you do that with a spirit of grace?
The next day I met a woman from Philadelphia. Before she left for her beach vacation, she had to leave her car at the garage for them to install a new catalytic converter. Hers had been stolen. The service manager at her garage said it would take a while for the part to arrive, then he mentioned that she was the 26th customer whose catalytic converter had recently been stolen. Hearing that news was a shock!
During her lengthy drive to Ocean City in her rental car, she considered her options. She could keep parking on the street but knew it made her an easy target. As the miles passed a plan began to take shape. Her commute to work wasn’t very long and she could easily take a city bus. If she got permission to park her car in the lot at her workplace and leave it there, that would stop would-be thieves. She rarely used her car for trips outside of her immediate neighborhood. But when she needed to use it, it was just a short ride on a bus to the parking lot where she worked.
I was listening to this woman’s story, but at that point I must have looked a bit skeptical about her plan. She smiled at me as she explained how appreciated she was at her job as an administrator. Meanwhile I’m imagining a huge parking lot, with just her vehicle in it. How safe would that be? That’s when she shared that she worked at a Philadelphia police station. Multiple vehicles are always parked there; officers come and go all hours of the day and night, making it one of the safest places to keep her car!
I don’t know how things will turn out for her. She’s heading back to Philadelphia today and will soon be back at work. I was impressed by the woman’s level-headedness as she dealt with the trouble and expenses that stemmed from the theft of her catalytic converter. I also admired the time she spent carefully and creatively considering her options. She could’ve gotten angry and held on to that resentment as she drove south, and let it diminish her joy while on vacation. That would drain any energy she might otherwise have to come up with possible solutions. This woman accepted, with admirable equilibrium, that bad things happen in life. But she also had a feisty spirit, so my guess is that by the time her car gets out of the garage, she’ll be driving to the police station’s parking lot and parking there – with their blessing. This true story illustrates the second part of the Serenity Prayer: having the courage to change the things we can!
My last story took place right before vacation when I was at Walmart with Mark. We were in the back aisle of the food section, and I was looking for coffee creamer. A large container, not a small one. Have you noticed that creamer is getting harder to find these days? I was discouraged as I looked at the mostly empty shelves, but on the bottom shelf one lone creamer lay there. With no thought of how difficult it might be to get this coveted creamer I got down on my knees and put as much of myself into that freezer as I could fit. I stretched my fingers out for the prize but wasn’t even close. As I stood up, and dusted myself off a bit, I looked for my long-armed husband. Well, from the look in his eyes I knew he was having nothing to do with this escapade. Nada. No way.
I’m not one to give up easily, who knows that about me? Most of you! So, I carefully scanned the long aisle looking for a worker. One young woman wasn’t very far away; when I waved to get her attention, she headed toward me. Things were looking up! As I started to explain my dilemma, Mark came up behind me and was trying to interrupt me. It was so not helpful. As I turned back to the worker, she was gesturing at the same time I was asking her to help me get the last creamer. We were getting nowhere. I tried speaking louder at one point, and then I tried using simple words. I wondered if English was her native language.
Then I figured out why we were having the communication problem. She was deaf, and I was wearing a mask so she couldn’t read my lips. Once she knew what I needed, she cheerfully went behind the cooler and got me the large-sized creamer. I thought about that strange encounter as we headed home. I was impressed that she was working in a large retail store where customers would regularly ask her for help. Above and beyond that she was working through our COVID pandemic, people had been - and some still were – wearing face masks. What a barrier that was, but she accepted it and went about doing her job. I couldn’t have been her first confused customer, but I might have been her memorable one for the week! I like to think that she accepted her deafness, knowing she could not change it. That sort of choice would bring serenity. But I also believe she had a good deal of courage – it’s what led her to apply for work and get that job. It takes wisdom to know when we need to accept the things we cannot change in life. And it takes courage to change the things we can.
I believe that most days of the week, something happens in or around our life that brings us to a decision point. We’d like to make wise choices. Sometimes we do, but we fall short often enough to know we need to improve. God knows that and is compassionate, knowing that we are still growing up into the likeness of His Son Jesus Christ. We know we shouldn’t look behind us at what is past but look instead at what is in our future. The One who is Ruler of the wind and mighty waves, who also knows the ebb and flow of our lives, watches over us at Walmart, the garage, the beach and everywhere we go. God will help us at our decision points, if we turn to him, giving us serenity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference! Thanks be to God, amen!
After trudging through hot sand, laden with towels and other necessities, we found a spot and set our things down. The wind was whipping, and the seagulls soaring as we eagerly crossed the final few yards. Our feet felt the shock of cold water, but we stayed put as we slowly sank, just a bit, into the cold sand.
It’s entrancing to watch waves form and crest and crash down. All ages find it fascinating. Another thing that impresses and lulls us is the sound of the ocean: there’s a quiet pause that’s followed by a thunderous crash as water hits the sandy shore. Then comes a subtle sound as the water ebbs, pulling itself back. That in-between time is when we feel anticipation. We’re alert, knowing that soon another wave will crest and wildly crash down on the shore. The rhythm of waves ebbing and flowing never ceases. I found myself wondering who else in the wide world was also standing on a shoreline in awe and gratitude. People living on every continent experience the same rhythm and power of ocean waves, crashing and receding on their own shores.
I savored the sights and sounds of the ocean, but I also did a good deal of walking near the shore. I enjoyed three things: getting some exercise, searching for shells, and people-watching. I noticed that many people prefer to sit quietly and anonymously under their umbrellas, or on their towels, reading or napping. But others were frolicking in the waves or trying to catch a wave with a boogie board – with mixed results. Kids of all ages happily dug holes and trenches in the sand; others built sandcastles. A good number enjoyed taking a walk or a jog on the beach. As I watched the kaleidoscope of activity around me, I noticed something - a simple thing really, but so important. It’s not so much what happens to us in life (or at the beach), it’s how we choose to respond that makes all the difference.
I want to share some scenes and stories with you this morning from the beach and elsewhere, and as I do, we’ll view them through the lens of the Serenity Prayer: God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference…
As the sun was setting and much of the beach crowd had left, I saw a young boy enthusiastically skipping flat rocks across a long shallow pool near the shoreline. His mom stood nearby patiently watching; when her son turned toward her again and again after a really good set of skips, she would compliment him or smile warmly. Her son’s face lit up with pure joy when his mom did that because it meant she was paying attention to him and praising him when he did well. Aren’t those such simple things?
As we got ready to leave, they were also leaving. That’s when we learned that all day long, this woman’s son didn’t want to splash in the waves or dig in the sand, he only wanted to skip rocks. She accepted that; it was what he wanted do. She didn’t judge it as a poor choice for a special day at the ocean. She graciously supported his choice. Did I mention that the boy was skipping rocks all day long? Somehow this mom had noticeable serenity as the sun was setting behind her. She chose to accept what she couldn’t change, and as she did the result was contentment. A peace emanated from her that I hadn’t seen anywhere else on the beach that day. How well do you accept things you cannot change? And can you do that with a spirit of grace?
The next day I met a woman from Philadelphia. Before she left for her beach vacation, she had to leave her car at the garage for them to install a new catalytic converter. Hers had been stolen. The service manager at her garage said it would take a while for the part to arrive, then he mentioned that she was the 26th customer whose catalytic converter had recently been stolen. Hearing that news was a shock!
During her lengthy drive to Ocean City in her rental car, she considered her options. She could keep parking on the street but knew it made her an easy target. As the miles passed a plan began to take shape. Her commute to work wasn’t very long and she could easily take a city bus. If she got permission to park her car in the lot at her workplace and leave it there, that would stop would-be thieves. She rarely used her car for trips outside of her immediate neighborhood. But when she needed to use it, it was just a short ride on a bus to the parking lot where she worked.
I was listening to this woman’s story, but at that point I must have looked a bit skeptical about her plan. She smiled at me as she explained how appreciated she was at her job as an administrator. Meanwhile I’m imagining a huge parking lot, with just her vehicle in it. How safe would that be? That’s when she shared that she worked at a Philadelphia police station. Multiple vehicles are always parked there; officers come and go all hours of the day and night, making it one of the safest places to keep her car!
I don’t know how things will turn out for her. She’s heading back to Philadelphia today and will soon be back at work. I was impressed by the woman’s level-headedness as she dealt with the trouble and expenses that stemmed from the theft of her catalytic converter. I also admired the time she spent carefully and creatively considering her options. She could’ve gotten angry and held on to that resentment as she drove south, and let it diminish her joy while on vacation. That would drain any energy she might otherwise have to come up with possible solutions. This woman accepted, with admirable equilibrium, that bad things happen in life. But she also had a feisty spirit, so my guess is that by the time her car gets out of the garage, she’ll be driving to the police station’s parking lot and parking there – with their blessing. This true story illustrates the second part of the Serenity Prayer: having the courage to change the things we can!
My last story took place right before vacation when I was at Walmart with Mark. We were in the back aisle of the food section, and I was looking for coffee creamer. A large container, not a small one. Have you noticed that creamer is getting harder to find these days? I was discouraged as I looked at the mostly empty shelves, but on the bottom shelf one lone creamer lay there. With no thought of how difficult it might be to get this coveted creamer I got down on my knees and put as much of myself into that freezer as I could fit. I stretched my fingers out for the prize but wasn’t even close. As I stood up, and dusted myself off a bit, I looked for my long-armed husband. Well, from the look in his eyes I knew he was having nothing to do with this escapade. Nada. No way.
I’m not one to give up easily, who knows that about me? Most of you! So, I carefully scanned the long aisle looking for a worker. One young woman wasn’t very far away; when I waved to get her attention, she headed toward me. Things were looking up! As I started to explain my dilemma, Mark came up behind me and was trying to interrupt me. It was so not helpful. As I turned back to the worker, she was gesturing at the same time I was asking her to help me get the last creamer. We were getting nowhere. I tried speaking louder at one point, and then I tried using simple words. I wondered if English was her native language.
Then I figured out why we were having the communication problem. She was deaf, and I was wearing a mask so she couldn’t read my lips. Once she knew what I needed, she cheerfully went behind the cooler and got me the large-sized creamer. I thought about that strange encounter as we headed home. I was impressed that she was working in a large retail store where customers would regularly ask her for help. Above and beyond that she was working through our COVID pandemic, people had been - and some still were – wearing face masks. What a barrier that was, but she accepted it and went about doing her job. I couldn’t have been her first confused customer, but I might have been her memorable one for the week! I like to think that she accepted her deafness, knowing she could not change it. That sort of choice would bring serenity. But I also believe she had a good deal of courage – it’s what led her to apply for work and get that job. It takes wisdom to know when we need to accept the things we cannot change in life. And it takes courage to change the things we can.
I believe that most days of the week, something happens in or around our life that brings us to a decision point. We’d like to make wise choices. Sometimes we do, but we fall short often enough to know we need to improve. God knows that and is compassionate, knowing that we are still growing up into the likeness of His Son Jesus Christ. We know we shouldn’t look behind us at what is past but look instead at what is in our future. The One who is Ruler of the wind and mighty waves, who also knows the ebb and flow of our lives, watches over us at Walmart, the garage, the beach and everywhere we go. God will help us at our decision points, if we turn to him, giving us serenity to accept the things we cannot change, courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference! Thanks be to God, amen!